I’m fixing a hole where the rain gets in..

Hey frienz.
Ya knowwww.. I use to be super guilty of serial dating.  I went from one serious relationship, to the next.  I was holding on to these dysfunctional and volatile relationships for reasons unbeknownst to me.  Why would I stay in something so bad for so long?  Part of it was, when you’re in a bad situation – you can never see how truly awful the circumstance is until you’re out of it.  Or you don’t want to.  Maybe I was scared to be alone.  Maybe I was even more scared to have to get to know myself.   
Regardless, I think so often we are keeping ourselves in negative relationships, because we’re scared of what will happen, or who we’ll be,  when we let go of them.  But, when the cons – outweigh the pros – you have to get out of there – for yourself!  You need to be able to stand on your own.  You need to love yourself.  You need to feel whole as a person, by yourself – before you can ever feel one – with someone else.  When you are trying to fill a void, with someone else’s love or attention.. you are signing up for an endless, empty, journey.  Someone else will never be able to give you enough attention, and will never be able to make you happy (even if they’re trying their hardest!) – because YOU are your problem.  
I took a year off.  One year.. maybe a little more.  No serious dating.  I got to know myself.  I figured out how I like to dress.  Where I like to eat.  What I like to do.  What I absolutely hate.  It was a journey I wouldn’t trade for the world.. and I feel lucky to have done it.  Some people go their whole lives with this void in their hearts. 
Maybe you don’t have a year – maybe you don’t have the patience for a long journey – maybe you’re already in a relationship, and desperately trying to be happy with yourself.  That’s fine.  I’d suggest some serious alone time (which is healthy for a relationship!) – and some soul searching.  Read some good books that will guide you on this journey (I’d recommend “A Place Of Yes” – Bethenny Frankel and “Spirit Junkie” – Gabrielle Bernstein).  Do some physical activity.  Eat well.  Journal.  Make lots of lists (of what you love to do, then do them).  Listen to yourself (AND YOUR GUT!).  When you are truly happy with yourself, you are at peace – and that will only make for the best relationship recipe.
Namaste. ;)

Pantone People!


Here’s a little-known fact: Crayola officially renamed the “flesh” color crayon “peach” in 1962, in response to the Civil Rights Movement. This was news to Mrs. Bacarella’s suburban Kindergarden classroom a couple decades later, where the “skin color” crayon was much in demand — until we got a stern talking-to by said Mrs. Bacarella about skin color and multi-culturalism.

Angelica Dass’s ongoing project Humanae offers a thoughtful way of looking at this puzzle of skin color. She photographs a colorful array of humans and then matches their skin tones to the Pantone color system. And it’s no exaggeration to say the results will reconfigure anyone’s color-vision. Look how pink and peach and rose and beige and mahogany and coffee-colored we are! What’s most surprising is the endless variety — if color is supposed to be divisive, then the sunburned and the very pale must be going to war — and how beautiful every single shade is.

Article Taken from Oprah’s Life Lift

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#Motivational Monday

Oh, hay guyZ.

Today’s post was plucked right from my morning coffee with my best friend.  Our conversations, if ever recorded, would be used as studies for ADD – they’re all over the place.  But, what we did touch on is – how good we both feel being physically active: her hitting the gym with her hubby and myself with [my new-found obsession] yoga.

Once upon a time I was a very unhappy girl.  I was never NOT confident in who I was as a person, but I was extremely self conscious of the shell I was in.  That’s actually putting it mildly.  Let’s get real, I hated myself.  Some of it stemmed from negative noise in my life that was reaffirming my feelings, some if it was my own doing, and some of it was picking up on behaviors I’d seen around me.. So this amounted in to one big ball of misery.  I was trapped in a body I did not love.  Over the course of a few years I took measures that were superbly unhealthy – crash dieting, not eating, or worse – and developed some really awful habits – like checking the scale way too often.  While going through this, I was also battling my chronic migraines (as I’ve mentioned in other posts).  Sometimes weight obsessions occur, when other areas of your life are out of control – so, I’m sure that we can partially attribute my migraines to this.  Eventually, I was put on a medication for my migraines, and I dropped a lot of weight. 

Now, 10 years later – I have such a different outlook on being ‘skinny’.  I am in love with myself (and this includes all flaws!) – and the things I dont like?  I will change – and I work every day to do that in a healthy way.  So when we spoke about this change in attitude (whether it came from maturity or just being more comfortable BEING ME) and how far I’ve come – we spoke about healthy attitudes – to which Christina [the bff] said “Be Healthy, Not Skinny”.  There it was! The perfect mantra. 

So, I invite you to take a hard look at yourself!  What don’t you like about yourself?  Now, change it.  Can’t change it? Then embrace it! You get one life – this is NOT a dress rehearsal – you deserve to live a life filled with [self] love, but you’re the only person that can make it happen.

Check out this awesome Pinterest page for some self love boosters!